What it felt like to be a little crazy:

I will be completely honest - my last week of pregnancy was rough.  Not physically - but emotionally.

It started Memorial Day weekend.  I got so many texts, emails, and facebook messages from people saying that they were praying for me and were excited to meet baby.  They were all very sweet and very much appreciated.  The downside to all of those notes and texts was that I started to feel a little isolated.  I felt like all of these people were waiting for baby to arrive and I couldn't call them until she made her appearance.

When I went to my 39 week appointment and was 4.5 cm dilated it was a little frustrating.  I knew from my pregnancy with Selah that I could be 4 cm dilated for a while (with her it was 6 days), but being that dilated for over a week was something new.  Not very many people get to be that dilated and not in actual labor - so I talked with my sister Colleen a lot.  She is the only other person I know that understood what it feels like - knowing that your body is prepped and ready to go into labor at any moment - but having it not doing anything is hard.

My false alarm didn't bother me as much as I thought it would-  I didn't even cry when they sent me home.  We had called Forrest's parents up to be with the kids in case they had admitted me.  We left the hospital with an induction for Saturday - less than 36 hours from then.  Forrest's parents were happy to stay.  Then I chose not to be induced.  We were stuck in this limbo area of not knowing when I would go into labor, and Forrest's parents couldn't really leave - in case I did go into labor.  I have fantastic in-laws - but I was in a situation I didn't want to be in.  For months I had been telling Forrest that the one thing I didn't want was people at our house waiting for me to have a baby (his parents or my mom).  I didn't want to feel that pressure - but yet here I was - in the exact scenario I didn't want to be in.

The Friday after our false alarm - I slept in (one of the benefits of having your inlaws at your house).  I tried to do my bible study, but the first paragraph was about anticipation and told a story about getting to hold the brand new baby she had been waiting for.  Let's just say I closed the bible study and cried and then didn't touch it again until after Kinsley had been born.  I spent a lot of that day praying and being by myself (bonus of having grandparents there).  I didn't have any peace about being induced the next morning.  I wanted this baby to arrive - but didn't feel good about inducing without a medical reason.  Forrest and I went to pick up take out for dinner and talked it through.  Since baby was doing well - we decided we didn't need to induce. We forgot to tell Frank and Lona until we were going to bed and they wished me luck.  (The hospital was going to call me at 6AM and tell me when I could come in).

Saturday morning at 6 I woke up and called the birth center to tell them I did not want to be induced and wasn't coming in that day.  I am pretty sure they don't get that phone call from very many 39+ week pregnant ladies.  I was pretty weepy on Saturday.  I knew that I had made the right decision, but it is a little difficult to wrap your hormonal head around the idea that you have had 2 chances to have your baby and have turned both down.  Several times that day I went to Forrest and just needed a hug.

By Sunday I was feeling a little more like myself.  We went to church and then out to lunch.  I had been really hoping to go into labor on Monday - it was my grandpa's 101st birthday and from the time I had found out my due date I had been hoping that this little one would share a birthday with him.  I share a birthday with my great grandma and just thought it would be neat.  Monday night I went to a dessert for the steering team of the Moms and Tots group that I am a part of.  I felt as normal as I had felt in a week.  I was having regular braxton hicks - every 8-6 minutes and enjoyed freaking out some of the moms there.  Some thought I should go to the hospital, others told me that if labor really started they had had natural births and could help coach me, and some thought I shouldn't drive home by myself.  It was pretty funny.  I went home and got some sleep - ready to head in to my hopefully last doctor's appointment the next day.

The False Alarm

From  Thursday May 30th, 2013

All black and white photos by Cassie Idler from Simply Cherished

Let's recap: On Tuesday I had been 4.5 cm dilated.  My doctor was willing to induce me on Thursday the 30th, but I declined.  She was willing to break my water and see if things got going, but there is no guarantee with that so I chose to wait it out.  I had been experiencing uncomfortable braxton hicks for weeks and they had always turned into nothing.  On this Thursday - I had forgotten to take my morning heparin shot and had decided to give myself an early evening shot (around 7) because that would be an easy 12 hour routine to get into.  Around 5:30 I started to get regular uncomfortable braxton hicks.  They were around 7-8 minutes apart and lasting around 45 seconds.  I wasn't sure if I should be giving myself a heparin shot in the middle of regular contractions or if I should just wait until they disappeared.  At 7 I decided to call the on call nurse to see if I should take my shot or not.  I left a message and she called me back half an hour later.  I tried to explain that the contractions were not painful, but I think all she heard was "3rd baby, contractions every 7-8 minutes" and she told me to go to the hospital.

Forrest and I finished getting the kids in bed, called our friend Matt to come stay with them, and left after Matt got there.  Forrest called his parents as we left to tell them to come up and I texted our birth photographer - Cassie to let her know we were headed to the hospital.  Forrest and I both knew that I was not in real labor - but we also knew that it was very possible that the hospital would admit me anyway and then get things started, which is why we told his parents to come up.

The drive to the hospital was pretty uneventful.  We arrived at around 8:30 and when we pulled up to the emergency room the car in front of us was this Jimmy John's delivery car - and the driver went into the hospital with a bag of food.  I thought it was funny and snapped a picture.

When we walked into the birth center's triage area - we were told that there were no triage rooms available and to wait in the birth center lobby.  The pregnant woman that came in right behind me was told the same thing.  It was pretty funny and I'm glad I wasn't in actual labor and moaning because that would have been AWKWARD with all of the small kids in the waiting area.  About half an hour later - the other pregnant lady was taken back to triage.  I was slightly annoyed (seeing as how I arrived first) until the janitor came out to clean up the water on the floor.  Apparently her water had broken when she stood up to walk back to triage.     I waited another half an hour - played on my phone, Forrest took my picture and walked around until they called me back.

When I was in triage, they hooked me up to the monitors.  It was fun to listen to baby's heartbeat and thankfully I was still having contractions - every 6-7 minutes apart, but they were not very strong.  While we were sitting there, Forrest and I made the final decision on what baby girl's name would be.  We thought it would be helpful if she was possibly going to arrive that night.  The nurse checked me and I was still 4-4.5 cm.  I talked with the on call hospital OB and they decided to have me walk around for an hour and see if that would do anything.  By this time it was after 10 PM.  Cassie-  our birth photographer had arrived and she decided to stick around and take some pictures.  

 I was determined to make the most of my hour - so I started walking - FAST.  Well, as fast as a 39 week pregnant lady can.

 I did a lot of squats, hoping that maybe baby would move into a better position.

 Forrest and Cassie just followed me around.  Cassie and I discovered that she went to college with my good friend Bailey Willcox - who is now married to my cousin Alfred.  Small world.

 I created a loop around the hospital going up and down the stairs.  The lobby area outside of the birth center had two sets of stairs, so I was able to go up one and down the next with squats and "fast" walking in between.   I did not want to go home, but obviously from my smiles - I was not in any real pain.

 Me pretending to do ballet while squatting.

 Reading the displays.

 About half way through my hour - I was hot and sweaty.  I had been working hard.  Back by the cafeteria there was an outside sitting area.  We all went outside to get some fresh air and cool off.  Since it was so late, the doors locked behind us.

 We then had to walk around the hospital, back to the ER entrance since it was the only entrance open and go back in to resume my loop of stairs.

When I went back to triage - they hooked me up to the monitors again and now my contractions were a steady 5 minutes apart.  When they checked me again - I was still 4.5 cm.  The OB on call talked to my doctor - and while my doctor was willing to have them admit me and induce by breaking my water - the hospital did not have enough staff to cover an induction.  They were too busy.  However, the hospital OB and my OB decided that I could be induced on Saturday.  When the nurse was checking us out - she said, "we normally tell people to come back when they are having contractions every 5 minutes, but in your case they need to be stronger."  Umm... thanks.  It was a bit frustrating to be sent home, but since I knew the entire time that I wasn't in actual labor - it was not too much of a surprise.

Forrest and I left and went home - getting there around 1:30.  Forrest's parents had arrived about 45 minutes before us.  We let them know we were home and that a baby would be coming on Saturday.  

Two weeks

Kinsley's stats at two weeks old

Head circumference: 13.8 inches (40th percentile)

Height: 21.7 inches (95th percentile)

Weight: 8 pounds 14 ounces (75th percentile)

Kinsley is now 7 ounces above her birth weight. Dr LeClair was impressed with her weight gain (although it is not as impressive as her sister's weight gain at this age). She is eating every 2 hours during the day and going 3 to 3.5 at night. 

She is a pretty content baby although we have had some rough times.  Like the night she ate every hour from 4 to 11 and the times when she has only wanted to sleep on me all day long.  

She will nap in her bassinet pretty well during the day, but evenings are tougher.  I fall asleep really easily and often wake up with her still on my chest after falling asleep burping her or with her swaddled in my arms because I was waiting for her to fall into a deeper sleep before I put her down.  It is a work in progress. 

The big kids are still in love with their little sister.  Selah has gotten good at asking if she can touch her sister and Ephraim is always willing to help out and kiss her.  

Just a little comparison

I

Selah - 10 days old

Ephraim - 12 days old

Kinsley - 12 days old

Father's Day 2013

How we are spending Father's Day.  Hanging out in the backyard playing in the pool and sunshine.  

Life with Kinsley

*The past nine days have been a bit if a blur, but we are loving our sweet little girl.  There are several things we have learned so far:

*Girl has zero arm control.  As in none   I enjoy watching her flail her arms like she is attacking invisible ninjas because it is exactly what I remember feeling when she was in my tummy. 

*because of her lack of arm control she loves being swaddled

*she likes pacifiers, but only when she is sleepy

*she eats every 2-3 hours but hasn't developed a consistent pattern yet.  

*we have struggled with her latch and saw a lactation consultant on Tuesday. Thankfully she had some ideas on how to help and gave us a nursing shield to get us through the next week or so until my milk regulates a little better

*Kinsley is a pretty chill baby.  Loud sounds don't seem to bother her much.  When she is mad or hungry though - watch out. Girlfriend has some lungs. 

*she is adored by her older siblings. Selah can't stop touching and kissing her and Ephraim loves to see her eyes open an is always telling me how cute she is 

*Kinsley loves to suck on her left thumb.  Maybe we will have a lefty like Forrest. 

*she makes the sweetest sounds when she is content.  I had forgotten how adorable all the little grunts and coos are. 

*with my other babies we followed the eat,awake, sleep routine.  Kinsley will do that occasionally but often falls asleep right after eating.  I thought I was pretty relaxed after Selah but think I am even more this time.  She will figure out her routine eventually and I am in no hurry to force one on her.  

*when she is alert, she is very alert and has great neck control.  

We are enjoying our newest addition and are looking forward ton learning more about her. 

39 weeks

Gestational age: 39 weeks
Weight: -.5 pound
Total weight gain: 26 pounds
BP: 122/70
Fetal Heart Rate: 145
Dilation: 4.5 cm


This past week has been interesting.  Last Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday I had a lot of strong Braxton Hicks contractions in the evenings.  In fact, on Saturday night, they started off pretty small and got progressively stronger and closer together.  At around 8:30 they were 6 minutes apart and stayed that way for about an hour.  If I was a first time mom I might have made Forrest take me to the hospital.  Even though I knew they were not quite the real deal - they were getting closer in pain to what I know they should be.  After talking with Forrest - I realized that all of our main kid watching people were out of town for the weekend - Bellingham participating in the Ski to Sea race, Wenatchee and Lake Oswego.  Um... crap.  I called my mom and she willing agreed to come up Sunday morning (we found some other friends willing to help us out Saturday night if need be - and Forrest's parents know that they are "on call" at all times).  My mom arrived around noon on Sunday and left Monday around 5.  I had approximately 3 contractions the entire time she was here.

Today I woke up not feeling well.  I haven't been hungry all day and I am exhausted.  I have taken two naps while letting my children watch tv.  I walked into my doctor's appointment almost convinced that there had to have been some progress over the week and that she would just send me to the hospital.  1/2 a cm is not enough progress and I am back home.  My doctor was surprised to see me this week - she had been on call Thursday and Friday and kept waiting for me to walk into the hospital.  She is willing to induce me this Thursday, but I'm not quite ready to go that road yet.  (Interesting side note - according to my last period, I will be 39 weeks on Thursday.  On all her early ultrasounds - baby measured 5 days ahead of my LMP -which makes way more sense of when I think she was conceived - which would have been 39 weeks on Sunday.  I choose Tuesdays as my weekly date - so that I would be inbetween both.)

I am actually pretty comfortable at the moment.  I am having a hard time sleeping - because my hips end up hurting and I spend a lot of time flip flopping in bed.  I haven't hit that "I'm done with pregnancy" phase yet - so while I would love for Baby girl to make her appearance, I am not quite ready to induce to get her out.  My doctor knows that I want to avoid pitocin and would be willing to just break my water and see if that gets my body to go into labor, but there is no guarantee that it would work, and then pitocin might need to be used anyway.  So, we will wait.  And I will enjoy my two big kiddos - who were pretty disappointed that the baby wasn't coming out today.